Bad Pun Corner

Tales of Lewis Hamilton’s totally legal tax affairs was legitimately classed as financial rather than sporting news and so diverted from the back to the front pages. It meant sport-loving readers avoided the sight Hamilton conspicuously failing to look like a gangsta-rapper and left the way clear for David and Antonio

David Luiz’s row with his manager at Chelsea was the gift that kept on giving for headline writers as we got first the irritating ‘Winner and Luizer’ from The Sun only to see The Mirror, seemingly determined to make their rivals look good, greet the world with ‘Luiz End.’

It’s a pun so bad that it requires some thought to put together the grammatically erroneous use of the player’s name with the information that he had to sit-out the match in the stands rather than play, thus leaving him unoccupied. The thought, as you can see, is in no way rewarded.

The Daily Star chip in with a piece titled ‘Conte has axe factor’ but they save their powder for the truly breath-taking ‘It’s Un hell of a relief!’ Riffing off Everton manager, David Unsworth’s first win in four games. The Star, apparently, would like us all to share the beleaguered Evertonians’ pain.

Midfield General (ret.)